Seattle Postpartum Couples Therapist Explains: How to Support You Partner Through Postpartum Depression
Seattle Postpartum Couples Therapist Explains: How to Support You Partner Through Postpartum Depression
Couples deal with so much change during the postpartum period. As a postpartum couples therapist in Seattle and online throughout Washington, I see couples get into conflicts or feel disconnected from each other throughout this life change for a myriad of different reasons. When couples come in for marriage counseling, one of the most common reason couples have a hard time connecting when dealing with a new baby is because of postpartum mood and anxiety disorders (PMADS). Specifically, it is common to experience postpartum depression (PPD). While often associated with the birthing partner, both members of the couple can experience postpartum depression. PPD can profoundly impact both members of the couple and significantly strain the dynamics of a relationship. A question I get asked a lot as a perinatal psychotherapist is this: how do I support my partner and our relationship through postpartum depression?
As a perinatal mental health specialist, it’s my job to normalize postpartum depression. Research shows us that Approximately 15% of women experience significant depression following childbirth (per Postpartum Support International). This statistic increases when the birthing person is a teen or experiencing poverty.
A Seattle Relationship Therapist Explains: How do I know if my partner or myself is experiencing postpartum depression?
Symptoms of PMADS can show up anytime during pregnancy, or within the first year after birth. This is a huge window of time! Some of these symptoms can include:
· Feelings of anger or irritability
· Lack of interest in the baby
· Increased or decreased appetite or sleep
· Bouts of tears, feelings of sadness
· Feelings of guilt, shame or hopelessness
· Feelings of nothing-ness
· Loss of interest, joy or pleasure in things you used to enjoy
· Possible thoughts of harming the baby or yourself
PPD depression is not a reflection of inadequacy or weakness. It is a complex interplay of hormonal, psychological, relationnal, and social factors that can affect anyone, regardless of gender. As a couple, recognizing the signs and symptoms of PPD is the first step towards seeking support and healing.
For the partner witnessing their loved one's struggle, it's essential to approach the situation with empathy and compassion. Understand that postpartum depression is not a choice but a challenge that requires patience, support, and professional guidance. Listen actively, validate emotions, and offer reassurance that you're in this together, as a team.
Communication is paramount during this time. Create a safe space for open dialogue, free from judgment or criticism. Expressing concerns, fears, and uncertainties can foster a deeper connection and alleviate the burden of isolation that often accompanies PPD. Remember, vulnerability breeds intimacy, and sharing the load lightens the burden. Express your concern and validate the feelings your partner expresses, and ask what support looks like to them.
Practical support is invaluable in navigating the complexities of postpartum depression. Whether it’s taking care of the baby when your partner cannot, stepping into household tasks, or encouraging self-care activities, every gesture of support reinforces the message that you're there, unwavering, in their journey towards healing. The more social support, the better. It’s time to rally your village. Additionally, encourage seeking professional help—a therapist specialized in postpartum depression can provide guidance, validation, and evidence-based interventions tailored to individual needs.
It's essential to maintain a sense of perspective amidst the challenges posed by postpartum depression. Remind yourselves of the strength of your bond, the love that brought you together, and the resilience that will carry you through this storm. Celebrate small victories, cherish moments of connection, and practice gratitude for the journey, however arduous it may seem.
Lastly, make sure you’re taking care of yourself as well. You cannot pour from an empty cup, and supporting your partner through postpartum depression can be emotionally taxing. Take time for yourself, engage in activities that nourish your soul, and seek your own support network to replenish your reserves.
Navigating postpartum depression as a couple is a journey fraught with challenges, but also ripe with opportunities for growth, resilience, and deeper connection. By fostering empathy, communication, practical support, and self-care, you can weather the storm together, emerging stronger, more compassionate, and united in your shared experience of parenthood. Remember, you're not alone—reach out, lean on each other, and journey towards healing, hand in hand.
Final Thoughts: Seattle Postpartum and Perinatal Therapist Explains
If you or your partner are struggling with postpartum depression, remember that help is available. Individual and couples therapy is recommended during this time. Reach out to a qualified therapist or healthcare provider for support and guidance tailored to your individual needs. For more resources, check out https://www.postpartum.net/get-help/. You're not alone, and together, you can overcome this obstacle and emerge stronger than ever before.